I arrived at the zoo, incognito, and followed signs to the aviary. The staff escorted me into the enclosure for the Arbor Day event. A conservation group organized it to raise awareness about humanity’s impact on Earth.
The itchy wig was necessary. My favorite diva-shades helped disguise large almond-shaped eyes, and the “Keep the planet clean, it’s not Uranus!” t-shirt was sure to avert suspicion.
A lecture about responsibility to the planet and its animal inhabitants preceded a meditative time to commune with nature, during which I snacked on Parakeets and stuffed a Macaw in my knapsack.
Being a celebrity on my planet afforded me exotic experiences, including cosmic delicacies.